Great Mentoring: Positive Conversations with Young People about Sexual Decisions is dedicated…
TO THOSE WHO ARE ADVOCATES
FOR THE SEXUAL HEALTH OF YOUNG PEOPLE:
We are here to listen…
not to work miracles.
We are here to provide honest information…
not to tell them what we want them to think
We are here to help them identify their alternatives…
not to decide what they should do.
We are here to discuss steps with them…
not to take steps for them.
We are here to empower them to discover their own abilities…
not to rescue them and leave them still vulnerable.
We are here to help them access resources…
not to take responsibility for solving all their problems.
We are here to care about their health and well-being…
not to judge them for their choices.
WE ARE HERE TO PROVIDE SUPPORT FOR HEALTHY DECISIONS!
Table of Contents for Great Mentoring: Positive Conversations with Young People about Sexual Decisions
PART ONE: INTRODUCTION
This section introduces the framework for mentorship as it relates to sexual decisions. Adult mentors can offer positive sexual decision-making support in both short- and long-term relationships. This introduction begins with a look at what those relationships might include, then includes principles for sexuality education and a discussion about what they might mean in a mentoring relationship, and finally includes tips for building a mentorship.
WHAT IS SEXUAL DECISION-MAKING MENTORSHIP?
PRINCIPLES FOR SEX EDUCATION RE-ENVISIONED FOR SEXUAL DECISION MENTORSHIP
TIPS FOR BEING A POSITIVE SEXUAL DECISION-MAKING MENTOR
PART TWO: BEING A GREAT MENTOR
This section provides a guideline for sexual decision-making mentorship. There are five steps to this process:
STEP 1: FIGURE YOURSELF OUT
This step provides an opportunity for you to concentrate on your personal history with regard to talking about sexuality, your opinions about sex, and your comfort level in supporting young people as they deal with sexual concerns.
STEP 2: MAKE A CONNECTION
Establishing a connection with a teen will help them feel comfortable with the mentor and will allow honest communication. This step focuses on tactics to help foster connections between mentors and teens.
STEP 3: ASSESS THE TEEN’S DEVELOPMENTAL STAGE
In order to succeed at being a positive mentor for young people, advocates need a basic understanding of the developmental issues affecting adolescents at different ages. This step includes important information about teens and how to best reach them.
STEP 4: INTERACT IN THE ADULT EGO STATE
The key to a positive mentoring interaction is creating an atmosphere that invites the teen and mentor to interact in respectful and proactive ways. This step focuses on fostering healthy interactions.
STEP 5: SUPPORT A HEALTHY DECISION
The role of the mentor in supporting a healthy decision is to guide the teen through the decision-making process and to fill in gaps in the teen’s knowledge. This step addresses ways to support teen’s decisions.
PART THREE: UNDERSTANDING TEEN DECISIONS
This section is focused on the stages that teenagers, and people of all ages, go through as they make changes in their lives towards better habits and choices.
FIVE BASIC PRINCIPLES OF BEHAVIOR CHANGE
This resource reviews the basic principles of behavior change.
FIVE STAGES OF CHANGE
This resource reviews the five stages that people move through as they change their behavior, particularly as they recognize a problematic pattern and move towards a healthy one.
WHAT’S SEX GOT TO DO WITH IT?
This fact sheet contains reasons for how teens make sexual decisions.
50 REASONS WHY TEENS DON’T ALWAYS DECIDE TO USE CONTRACEPTION OR SAFER SEX
Decisions to use contraception and practice safer sex are very complex ones. This resource contains 50 reasons people give for not using protection from pregnancy and sexually transmitted infection.
PART FOUR: RESOURCES
This section includes handouts of information to give to young people to support their sexual decision-making processes.
FINDING HELP: A RESOURCE LIST
This gives participants a resource guide for finding help.
FIVE THINGS TO KNOW ABOUT TRAUMA
By Joann Schladale, MS, LMFT
This resource reviews the four components of a trauma-informed approach for sexual health.
HEY, MOM? HEY, DAD? (HEY…GRAM?) CAN WE TALK ABOUT ABSTINENCE?
This lesson is designed to help young people begin a dialogue about abstinence with their parents, guardians, or other trusted adults.
CONTRACEPTIVE OPTIONS CHART
This chart reviews how each option works and the pros and the cons of each one.
SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED INFECTIONS: A SUMMARY
This resource delves into describing STIs, STI symptoms, and what to do if a teen thinks they have one.
This resource reviews how to access condoms, store condoms, and how to use them.
Introduction to Great Mentoring: Positive Conversations with Young People about Sexual Decisions
By Karen Rayne, PhD
Conversations about sexual and reproductive health between teenagers and adults can be difficult. Many adults struggle with how to approach these conversations without much guidance. Great Mentoring: Positive Conversations with Young People About Sexual Decisions is designed to support educators, nurses, volunteers, and other professionals who interact with teenagers either directly or in passing as they develop their ability to talk with young people about their sexual decisions.
Beginning with general principles of sexuality education, including self-assessment tools and a theoretical framework for respectful dialogue, and closing with adolescent development and decision-making, this guidebook provides a roadmap for adults who are invested in serving as a short- or long-term mentor for young people. From one-time conversations to longer relationships, Great Mentoring: Positive Conversations with Young People About Sexual Decisions provides a unique perspective of youth autonomy backed up with adult support and insight.
Great Mentoring: Positive Conversations with Young People About Sexual Decisions is a new incarnation of Positive Encounters: Talking One-to-One with Teens about Contraceptive and Safer Sex Decisions, which was written by Amy Vogelaar in 1998. This new version brings that guidebook up-to- date by incorporating technology, sexual and gender identities, and scenarios that will feel accessible and critical to the current conversation. The timeless parts of Vogelaar’s original version remain intact, ready to provide support to a new generation of professionals.
Teenagers need conversations with skilled adults who are ready to be mentors. They need to have relationships with adults who will provide them with guidance as appropriate, but who are more focused on supporting the teenager as they develop their own insights and build their decision- making skills. Great Mentoring: Positive Conversations with Young People About Sexual Decisions will create more of these relationships in more places, allowing young people to be healthier and happier while their adult mentors are more skilled and more confident in their skills.